Is Social Media making us Hardnosed?

It doesn’t matter to me what you believe about politics, religion, or finances. I don’t care who you support politically and I won’t hate you if we disagree.

So what if you’re a vegan, vegetarian, or a carnivore?  It simply has nothing to do with me. More importantly, if you’re Christian, Muslim, Atheist, or Agnostic, if we’re friends or family, I will look past our differences and look at what we have in common. Moreover, I will listen to you with compassionate and empathy.

You can post whatever you want, wherever you choose, and I am ok with that!  

That said, if I feel you’re open minded enough to have a debate, I might debate with you.  But trust me on this, I won’t unfriend, unfollow, or disown you if we disagree.  I enjoy a great debate and I won’t hold your opinions against you regardless how heated our debate might become.  The truth is that no matter what our differences might be, it has no bearing on me personally. I won’t take your opinion personally because it has nothing to do with me, even if your comments are directed at me. It is merely an opinion.

Since the Paris terrorist attacks on Friday, November 13^th, 2015, social media have been flooded with personal opinions. There have been numerous comments on the event and the fallout on social media was swift. Many people have unfriended each other based on what these comments meant to them. To be sure, there were some very ugly comments in the newsfeeds. Emotions were volatile and by and large people held very strong opposing opinions. Terrible things were written, and shared widely, largely to people who didn’t even know each other.

Which begs the question, is social media making us inflexible and jerks?  Are we becoming more egocentric, in that we believe our opinion matters and is paramount? I think, yes we are and yes, we most certainly do. 

And, I also think social media gives us a false sense of courage, and ironically our anonymity online makes us feel important. The fact is because we are not face to face, looking into the eyes of a person, that we have the courage to espouse our unfiltered and sometime knee jerk reactions to something we have read online but really this can be an act of cowardliness. Furthermore, more often than not we are not held responsible for the fallout that ensues after certain comments are posted. We can simple disappear from the conversation or troll silently following the discussion thread, feeling self-important.

If we exercised a sober second thought about what we write on Facebook, Twitter and blogs, we might never even post online. For me, this is certainly true that I delete more comments I begin to write after thinking about it than I actually post. This is particularly true if I am commenting on something that has annoyed me.  Sometimes, I will read something online and say to myself, “OMG!” “idiot”, “Does that person not fact check”, “WTH”, etc. Then, I will quickly write a critical and judgmental reply.  But then, I have trained myself to pause and decide whether or not to delete my comment because my opinion on social media to virtual strangers in the greater scheme of things, does not matter!  

Thankfully, humanity is culturally diverse with varying points of view. I can’t imagine what this world would look like if everyone thought like me. Well, I can, and it would be pretty awesome.  But, I digress! 

On the whole, my opinion is that if you want a simpler life and keep your blood pressure in check, don’t take everything you read on social media as a personal affront to your character, integrity, morals, or ethics.  The more you let go of your ego, the freer you are and the less of a jerk you become.  And if you are tempted to lash out in haste, it is very therapeutic to put down in words exactly how you are feeling.  But take a deep breath and then delete it! 

The foregoing was my personal opinion and hopefully was not an affront to anyone who reads it. That said, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t comment. LOL

To Speak or Not to Speak, our Choice!

I am back! My previous blog post on the Neil Young Tour hit a nerve and received more attention than I could ever have imagined. Indeed, it is a blogger’s dream to engage readers on a level of interest that could transition an inconsequential blog post into an incredible online conversation that garnered the attention of mainstream media.  Remarkably, feedback to my post was overwhelmingly positive and engaging.

Which is why I was dumbfounded by members of my First Nation to my last blog post and subsequent five-minute interview on CBC Radio’s Eye Opener.  I was told that my actions (what I said) would harm our community's progress. All they took from my attempt to explain a complex situation was that I was attacking them and their cause. My efforts were unfortunately misconstrued, which resulted in creating a discord where none should have existed.  After all we are on the same side.

When I was told, “I hope you know what you just did” in reference to my blog and interview on CBC. I will respond in this way… I am a one minor voice speaking on issues of great import to me, as they are too, and furthermore freedom of speech is protected as a fundamental right for all of us in our Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms. 

That said, I know I have a responsibility, as a blogger, to ensure that my writing will not harm others and to be respectful in how I write on issues. I am mindful of these limitations and ensure that in my own personal views whether being expressed in my blog or other social networks are balanced and always within the scope of good judgment.

Therefore, my apologies for describing my Chief in a way that was disrespectful.  Sometimes, we get caught up in an emotional piece we are writing.   But we should always step back to review and edit once our emotions have subsided before posting online. 

To smooth things over since I wanted to work with my Chief and to demonstrate my good will I immediately removed my blog from the Internet.  But our relationship appears to be beyond repair, so I put it back up. 

As mentioned earlier, it is a dream to have attracted a high level of traffic to my blog, and removing it felt like I was letting myself down. I’ve been blogging since 2007 and it was a big deal to me to take it down. I decided, in the end, this was my personal blog and in this country we have freedom of speech.  After careful consideration, I decided to put it back up, edited.  

Friday's What the Heck/ It's About Time

 I often ponder in advance the subject of my next blog.  This time, I got to thinking about why I blog. At the end of the day, I hope to achieve by blogging a collection of stories, memories, which I am completely grateful for. 

Indeed, it goes without saying that I enjoy blogging. But more importantly as in my title “My Magnificent life” it clearly is about my life.  My experiences. My musings.  My interest. My opinions.  (I just realized that, I, a person who strives to avoid attracting attention to myself, have devoted an entire blog all about me! Ironic.) That is enough about me. :)

May was a busy month. My mom celebrated her 93^rd birthday and it leads me to contemplate the issue of time.  Not old age, nor the balance of life and death.  But in particular, about why time appears to speed up as we get older, or is it just me?  I remember, as a child each summer day seemed to go on for an eternity and that was okay with me.   What happened? When did our perception of time change?

For me, suddenly one day I noticed, days became weeks, and then months.  Time just began to collapse into a blur.  Trying to hold on to the minutes before they vanished is impossible. It is like pouring water on hot rocks; it sizzles, vaporizes, and is gone.

And, in a nutshell, that is why it is nice to be able to go back and read my past blog posts.  Blogging is my way of capturing snippets of my life, which if left to chance might disappear into the abyss.  Usually, I'll pick a quite time at the end of the year to pick events from the  previous year. More often than not, a smile will grace my face but sometimes tears too as I go back into time and read various posts.  It is a glimpse into my life, souvenirs of the good and bad. 

That said, already, I feel like I’ve done a whole summer’s worth of activities and it’s not yet the end of May. 

When the family gathered in the same city earlier this month for my mom’s birthday party, this presented a perfect opportunity to spend an evening with my five beautiful sisters.  This was a rare occasion because it seems that someone is always missing at family events.  Reconnecting and reminiscing about time past and celebrating current successes produced precious laughter.   Moreover, big sisters keep you real.  Lol!  (An interesting observation, my brothers don’t seem to make an attempt to get together.  Is this a male thing, I wonder?) 

The following day, a huge birthday party!  I admit being a bit of a control freak (read, bossy!) and I was somewhat taken a back when I discovered no one was in charge of coordinating the event.  How is that possible, no boss, I thought? How will people know who is responsible for this or that and what type of food to bring, this being a potluck an all?  And, it didn’t help my state of mind either when the wild meat for the soup was delivered still frozen and unprepared at 1 pm.  Yikes!!! 

In the end, it all came together like magic, everyone pitched in and did what needed to be done and brought perfect yummy dishes.  I have an awesome family!  

Mama (as she is known to everyone) had no idea what we planned as she had a small party on her actual birthday.   She entered the Friendship Centre and was greeted with an explosion of applause and happy birthday sung by everyone!  Clearly, by the look of her it was a major surprise.

As a gift to her I created our family tree.  It was an amazing process for me researching seven generations of family. As I read the research reports, I imagined the era of that individual person. I was especially blown away when I wrapped my mind around how much has changed in the world. Particularly, our technology! I tried to imagine what my great, great, grandmother would think if she knew I was researching her lineage on a computer, viewing it later on an ipad and sending electronic files on my iphone to the internet in real-time so those who could not be in attendance would feel like they were part of the celebration.  In terms of time, this progress is but a wee blimp in the history of time, and yet to my mom, it is real science fiction.

When printed, the descendant report was over ten feet long with 258 people and 93 families.   I can’t imagine how mama felt knowing she is responsible for a community hall full of people, not to mention those who were absent! Interestingly, her mother was an only child.  How awesome, huh!

May is a month for family birthdays, and another birthday surprise for my dear special young ladies.  Thinking up surprise is what I really enjoy doing but sometimes I collaborate with someone and in this instance I needed Jenelle’s help. It was killing her to keep the secret I know, but so worth it! What do you get a budding contortionist? Well a contortionist dream holiday, that’s what!

Later, on the  May long weekend, on a gorgeous sunny day, we attended a small intimate wedding at a beautiful historical venue. 

My bias to be sure is small weddings, and this wedding was perfect!  The bride looked as all brides do on their day, absolutely radiant.   Apparently, the groom said to his bride as they were planning the wedding,” A maximum forty people and if one extra person is invited, the wedding would have to go on without me.”  The bride must have taken him literally because there were no more than forty people in attendance.  Well, that we knew of anyway.  Because apparently this historical building had a resident ghost who is known to make an appearance each day at 2:30, but no one at the wedding actually saw her.   

Finally this week, I completed (actually I co-coordinated the riverfront landscaping) including a spot for late night bonfires at the cottage.  It looks spectacular! 

Wow, this was a hectic month! It’s no wonder time appeared to whiz on by quick like lighting.